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iMoral – the app guide to Moral Relativism

Current Affairs: Technology
It’s life innit

iMoral smartphone app

Invaluable app helps you navigate around the pitfalls of Moral Relativism

Article originally published in GTG June 2012 – The GTG: years ahead of the curve!

Old Street, Sept 20th:
The dynamic nature of Political Correctness and the ebbing and flowing of old and new pet causes can lead to moral confusion among even the most enlightened citizens of modern Britain, sometimes leaving us so dazed and distracted that we are unable to function effectively.

For example, you might be a feted member of the country’s social elite who is a passionate supporter of a mysterious and beguiling web whistleblower. Then to your horror he is accused, by a country with impeccable left-wing credentials, of unpleasant crimes against women. What do you do? Do you stick to your feminist mission, swallow your pride and throw him to the dogs? Or do you convince yourself that the country making the accusation has somehow transformed itself from a bastion of liberal respectability into a fascist lap-dog of the evil empire, the USA? Tough one!

Or you might believe fervently in the rights of different cultures to live according to their own established and worthy traditions, but you aren’t quite comfortable with some of them chopping off their daughters’ lady parts, or ostracizing them (or worse) for refusing to marry their middle-aged cousin or for being caught kissing another girl at the local pub?

Perhaps you are an advocate of the right of individuals to express their sexuality freely and however they like, but you don’t know how to square that with your concern for the welfare of small furry rodents?

Or you believe Steve Jobs is a deity but you’ve heard a great joke about him and you don’t know if you should laugh or not?

Maybe you’re passionate about the environment and would never want to promote the use of artificial oil-derived materials. But bamboo is so scratchy and you would never consider wearing the remains dead animals on your feet?

What are you to do?

Technology to the rescue!

You are in luck! iMoral is a new app for iPhone and iPad that provides instant up-to-date advice on these dilemmas!

Cloud Vision
Fed by a constantly updated cloud database, iMoral provides rapid and definitive advice on the current relative importance of religion, race, colour, culture, gender, age, disability, the environment, animal rights, organic and GM agriculture, politics and even which tax loopholes are in and out of fashion in polite society.

The database is kept relevant and up-to-date by heuristic software that scans the entire internet for the comments, opinions and diktats from the world’s leading moral guardians, including religious leaders, theologians, philosophers, judges, doctors, celebrities, x-factor contestants, London Cab drivers, Stan the pisshead at the Chav n’ Pikey Tavern, and (of course) Bono.

iMoral can be downloaded now for 50p

Greyscale Rating: Ash

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